Lord I cry out to you

More desperate than ever before...

Dear Jesus, I beleive I've reached my limits

I can't carry this cross no more.

 

More deeper than deep

I conceal my feelings inside

Too ashamed to confront them,

Just ever wanting to hide.

 

Lord I know I've failed you

And in truth, I'm not worthy to call your own

I've forfeited the strength you've offered

Refusing to follow the path that you've shown!

 

So, Why do I come to you now?

With my regrets and guilt in tow;

Merely to say "I'm sorry"

And true repentence to show...

 

Finally I've learned the lesson you tried to teach

Regrettably, I feel it's really too late,

To follow the path you've chosen

Because in ignorance, I've sealed my fate.

 

I now know - How Peter must have felt

When three times your Holy name, He denied

I now experience the pain

As in deep anguish I cry.

 

Lord, I must trust that what is meant to be,

You will work out for my good,

It's just that I can't stand to be at the beginning again,

Where with high aspirations, I already once stood!

 

This is my way of leaving my all on the altar

To await the refiner's fire

Please purge me, and cleanse me

So that with you, I can once again climb higher...

 

Please help me follow you through everything

Regardless of where that road may lead,

Please help me accept your will

Please remind me you'll meet my need!

 

I forget so often,

And so often, I feel alone...

So often I'm guilty of not doing things in your strength,

And instead trying to do it on my own!!!

 

 

this poem was written February 11, 2005. It reflects the frustration, despair, and humility I was going through at the time. (I was a living sacrifice that crawled off the altar, or in my case ---- Fell out of my "tree!" I landed on my head.)

 

God heals though...and restores!

 

If the LORD delights in a man's way,
       he makes his steps firm;

     though he stumble, he will not fall,
       for the LORD upholds him with his hand.

Psalm 37: 23, 24(NIV)

To this day, I still hold onto that promise. Thank you JESUS.

Thank you for the tag on my journal and I hope you don't think I'm a legalistic ... I'm not by any means... I think we just need to be careful when non believers or "baby christains" are involved... books that preach the half truth or books that are written to just make us feel all warm & fuzzy inside arent focusing on the true word of God but more about making sales...I am glad you tagged me though, I will definetly be back to visit :)

Don't worry.I never thought you're being legalistic...I happen to agree with you to some extent. (It sort of drives me nuts that he uses so many different versions, for his references.) You are very right when you say we "need to be careful when non-believers or 'baby christians' are involved..." There has been many occasions when I've felt inclined to say things (because God has enlightened me to certain things) but I have declined because I know it would do more damage than good. (Again DISCERNMENT needs to be practiced.) Thank you for visiting my site. I appreciate you doing so...May God Bless you!

I do believe that the Father & the Son are one and I do believe that God lived in/through Jesus, I was a little confused by the post Dennis wrote about all of that and thought that he was suggesting that God wasnt always there & that he was "born" one day... I believe that God was born through Jesus, yes... but only through Jesus... and I believe that God was and has always been. I dont even think I would use the term that "God was born" though, just because I think it confuses others... I think it would make someone think that God wasnt always there... Again, I just am always careful on how I word things as to not confuse new believers. I would rather explain to someone that God lived through Jesus and Jesus was born to wash away our sins than to explain that "God was born" Know what I'm saying?? Anyway... I hope that made sense LOL Have a great weekend!!